Acceptance

I haven't cried since Sunday. And that probably seems like no big deal but to me recently that is a huge accomplishment. While laying in bed last night, I was thinking of him. For the first time I was longing for someone's arms, and that someone wasn't you. I'm going to be okay. I'm never going to forget you. Because so far, the best days have been with you. But that doesn't mean there won't be better days with someone else. It doesn't mean that you're the only guy who is going to make my heart leap out of my chest. Don't flatter yourself.

Looking back now, I feel like such a foolish child. I should have just cut off all ties when we ended. Because I ruined any chance of us being friends. I just keep pushing and wanting answers. But the answer was simple. You just weren't in love with me anymore. And that's a hard pill to swallow, but I acted so weak and immature, so out of character. But it's all okay now. I'm back on my feet. And when people ask about you. I don't break down or avoid it. I tell them that it's over, and that i'm okay with that, because for the first time, I really am.

I still get confused about how quickly you moved on. But it doesn't tear me apart anymore. I know you're spending new years with her, and that was supposed to be our time together. And I don't really care anymore. I honestly just want you and I to both end up happy.