Lacking Motivation.

   I'm in a creative mood and I am sick of all this work tying me down.  I hate having a schedule to follow and due dates to adhere to. I need someone or something to inspire me.  It has been a struggle the last few days.  My friends were home this weekend.  Those three girls that have been through it all with me.  I was so jealous.  I want to see them and laugh with them.  Because they make me happier than anything else.  It has been hard not seeing them and talking with them 24/7.  I am always the strong one of the group, with my jello heart, but i find myself consistantly missing them.  Don't get me wrong. I love it up here. I like the friends I have made and I don't know what I would do without my room mate.  What a life safer.  I just miss the comfort of being able to say anything and not be judged.  When i found out Gabby was going home too the first thing i did was ask steve if he would drive me home.  That obviously worked, haha, not.  It's hard to go from having people around all the time to never having them there.

    Your working your way back into my life.  And it's been amazing just talking to you.  It still aches when we talk.  But i'm a strong girl, I can handle it.  I hope you know that you have let me down a lot in the past.  You have hurt me more than anyone else, and i have cried over you more than I would ever admit. Just don't lie to me.

If you fall i swear, i'll pick you right back up.